My friend Jody was nice enough to look over Seeing Spots and beta it for me. Following her advice, I added a new first chapter which has more dialogue and less introspective, internal monologue-y stuff-- more showing and less telling, in other words. I think it flows much better now. I've been playing around with it all day, and will probably take a break soon, and get back to it later. Still, I'm very happy with how much I've accomplished on it today.